Dreams sometimes do come true

I had a dream last night, or this morning rather, about Dylan and Riley. It was an odd dream, the kind that I usually have about them. I was deffinately not here in my bed. I could feel myself soaring through the sky. The wind was touching my skin, and then I dipped low into the river. I could feel the coolness of the water, and see the bright sun shining high in the sky. Then I went up, up through the clouds and into the bright blue sky. When I finally stopped, I heard myself "How are the boys?" Then it was like a movie. Like that movie with Adam S.andler and the remote control. A screen flashed in front of me. There, right there within my arms reach, were Dylan and Riley. They were big! Big little boys! Their hair was the same color as Lily's. They had her impish grin. They were playing in the sand wearing matching shorts. They were brown, and they were shirtless. They were laughing. They had big brown eyes, and they seemed to recognize me with a smile. No words. No tears. Just happy. Then again, "How is Mimi (my grandmother)?" and then, just like that, the scene changed and there she was sitting in a rocking chair reading a book. She smiled, and that was it. Before I knew it, I was headed back to the sky and I could move my body in my bed again.

I cannot get that image of the boys out of my mind. They were so happy.

Now I feel like I owe it to them to be that happy.

Someone told me recently that my fear could be stopping Lily from reaching her full potential. My fear that she is going to die is stopping her from being her. My fear that she'll be kidnapped or that I'll be carjacked is not helping her. My fear of big, giant, sticky messes is prohibiting her from reaching her full potential as a child. Heck, even my fear of her dirty face or dirty clothes is keeping her from being a kid. I'm trying to let it all go. Working on it. My biggest fear, of all my crazy fears, is that she'll be just like me. So, one stickly little mess at a time, I'm trying to let go. I owe it to Dylan and Riley to be happy and for our family to be happy. They deserve to look down on us while we're finger painting in our underwear (how's that for a picture?) and not freaking out about watermellon juice running down our arms. Haha, yes, you're laughing...but I am that mother.

~*~*~*~*~*

Speaking of happy, Erica had her little boy, JJ. He's in the NICU and could use any prayers you can spare. Or you know, whatever it is that you believe. He is living proof that dreams and prayers really do get answered.