Wrong Fit

I've been feeling for a long time now that I don't quite fit here anymore. I don't fit in the babyloss community. I have a living child. I also don't fit in the incompetent cervix circle anymore. I'm people's worst nightmare there. I also don't fit in the preemie groups. They don't necessarily understand my grief. It's a strange place to be. I'm sure you guys even are tired of hearing from me.

Something happened this past weekend that made us completely rethink where we stand as a family. We're ok, but it made for a hard week to be harder. At least for me.

I'm going to take a break from blogging for a while. It's with a heavy heart that I make this decision, but I need to try and move forward. I have an appointment with a counselor in a few weeks. I'm unable to move from there to here, and along the way I've had a lot more to deal with than I expected. This was once an outlet for my grief and to feel less alone, but it doesn't feel like that anymore. It's become a place of anger and bitterness. I don't want to write that and you don't want to read that. I'm not this person in real life.

If you are interested in keeping in touch you can find me on F.aceboo.k. Otherwise, I'm not sure when I will be back.

Thank you all. Tremendously. You gave me life. You helped me give life to Dylan and Riley. You celebrated with me and cried with me. You lifted me up. I hope I was able to give that back to you. I love you all and you will always be a huge part of my life.

xoxoxo